I Became the Academy’s Kibitz Villain

Chapter 106: Messing Up Is A Hero's Basic Skill (4)

After briefly conversing with my guts.

I sorted out the repertoire of conversations in my mind and dialed the number with resolve.

I didn’t think it would be as easy as it was with Baek Seol-hee. In the worst-case scenario, I might make Yumir my enemy.

But the chief’s command was absolute, and I must follow it.

If the chief had set the direction, then it was the right way, and I must ensure that this path did not get ruined because of me.

“That’s right. If everything gets ruined, I can just move as the Goblin of Yi Maemangnyang after burying Do Ji-hwan.”

The library’s books could be turned into my private collection after I conquered Sejong Island. I might not be able to see it immediately, but it would be mine someday in the future.

Therefore…

Even if my relationship with Yumir worsened or was severed, I dared to ‘challenge’.

Brring.

“Hello? Is this Student Yumir?”

[Hello, teacher? It seems you’ve been pretty busy last night?]

Yumir jabbed at me from the start.

[I didn’t know you were so busy, teacher. Hehe.]

“What do you mean?”

[I wonder. What could I mean? Why are you calling now when a lovely female college student texted you last night? Right?]

“I was busy with patriotism.”

[…….]

This time, I was taken aback.

[Oh, um. Well, patriotism, I guess? Haha. I saw the news about Gangwon-do, and it’s quite a mess….]

“I did.”

When she didn’t understand my beating around the bush, I directly said it.

[Uh, um, what…?]

“I said I did it (※beep) with my wife.”

[…Wife?]

Yumir’s voice fell silent.

“…I see.”

[Um, what do you mean… You have a wife?]

“Yes.”

[Did you ever mention that?]

“I don’t think I’ve mentioned it to you?”

To clarify one thing!

I told Baek Seol-hee that I was married, but I had not yet told Yumir that I was married. Instead, I made a joke about the type of woman I would like to marry, and Yumir believed I was still single.

[Are you married, teacher?]

“Yes. We’re a couple.”

[……Hmm.]

Yumir didn’t say anything.

I waited a moment for her to speak, and soon, I felt a slight chuckle mixed in Yumir’s voice.

[A person I know said that all men are wolves.]

That was what the Goblin said.

[Teacher, did you, despite being married, flirt with a fresh college girl?]

“Yes.”

[Yes? Wow, are you admitting it?]

“Yes.”

Since I had decided to walk the path of a scoundrel, I might as well be a proud one.

“Are you disillusioned?”

[It’s not just disillusionment; I feel like I’m about to turn into a devil.]

“Don’t go too far. What if you go to the Goblin?”

[I feel like I could half-kill the Goblin by cuddling up right now?]

“So you’re saying you’ll spare half?”

[Wow. Annoying. I might just kill it.]

Despite the terrifying words pouring out, I felt my heart pounding with the realization that everything was going according to plan.

[Wow, what is this person? Is this that thing I’ve heard of… Haa. Seriously, you make me say things I don’t even want to say! Really!!]

“That can seem so.”

[What?!]

Yes.

[Ah, are you teasing me? Is that it? Please say that it’s a mean joke and that you’ve annoyed me to the point of wanting to tear everything up.]

“That would be difficult.”

Everything was going according to the planned repertoire now.

[Don’t you have something like a body pillow at home? A Dakimakura. Like printing an S-rank superhuman covering a body pillow and taking that as your wife.]

“It’s a real person.”

[Then it’s a real wife? When did you get married?]

“Last Christmas.”

Although it was a bit ambiguous to call it a wedding, last Christmas was certainly a monumental day for me. From that day on, my life signaled a new beginning. From that day on, I decided not to live to avoid dying but to enjoy happiness in this world.

[So, you’ve been married for less than four months now?]

“Just barely four months, right?”

[But you came to Sejong Island during your honeymoon, flirted with a girl, and all that?]

“Was there something between you and me?”

[…….]

She didn’t respond, seemingly taken aback by the direct question.

“Student Yumir?”

[Oh, wow, no. Um… Hehehe.]

Yumir started to laugh as if she was broken. I was a little worried that Yumir might say something strange, but maybe this could be okay in its own way.

Either I would succeed in completely separating Do Ji-hwan and the Goblin.

Or, as the boss planned, this would be her approach, even knowing that I was married, and create a debt of conscience.

As I did with Baek Seol-hee.

“Student Yumir.”

It was judgment time.

“I thought we had something.”

[……Pardon?]

“Was it only me who felt something?”

[No, wait, what…?]

Yumir was flustered. As I straightforwardly mentioned ‘something’, Yumir’s voice started to tremble.

“A man wouldn’t invite a girl he has no feelings for to his house. Isn’t that so? Any man would have ulterior motives inviting a beauty like you home.”

[Ho, hold on. You said you’re married?]

“Yes. I’m married.”

[But why? Isn’t that a betrayal of your wife?]

“It’s not a betrayal?”

[Excuse me?]

“It’s not a betrayal. I got permission. She actually likes it.”

From now on, common sense and reason were thrown away.

“My wife is a woman who enjoys me playing with other women.”

[No, that’s crazy….]

“Crazy? Be careful with your words. My wife just has a slightly different taste from others.”

It was not an ordinary taste.

“Right. You might be shocked. But listen well, Yumir. There can be various kinds of people in the world. There could be a villain who hides their identity and lives amongst the heroes, a magical girl who fights for justice while hiding herself from the world, and a woman who feels happiness watching her husband dating and playing with other women.”

[Does that even make sense?!]

“It makes sense. In a world where superpowers exist, wouldn’t that make sense? In this era where people fly around riding a dragon covered in scrap metal and firing flames?”

[That’s different! Nooo!!]

It might be an unimaginable thing in common sense, but this was the shortcut to sort out my actions so far and, moreover, to move forward according to the boss’s plan.

“My wife is into NTR.”

[What…?!]

“What am I saying? NTR, NTR. She feels happiness and pleasure watching her husband playing with other women.”

[Wha, what…?]

“You know, there are people like that in the world.”

I heaved a deep sigh.

“That’s what marriage is. Living by adjusting to each other, living by conceding to each other. Living with a complete stranger is like that.”

As if I couldn’t help but love such a person, I spat out words like a machine gun to prevent Yumir from thinking deeply.

“I’m sorry if it was unpleasant.”

[…Ah, is this some kind of code language? Your side’s code language?]

“Your side?”

[Why…! Something different to express during the recruitment process… Ah, no. Ah, really…!]

There was a sound as if she was patting her chest, a thumping noise.

[Company… Ah, no. I misspoke. Ha, haha. The weather is quite bright, but the phone conversation is like a slum. Ew.]

She might be hitting her chest out of frustration, and that sound seemed to come through the phone.

[May I ask a question? Why did you suddenly spill it? Did your wife tell you to do so?]

“Uh.”

[Fact.]

“My wife said so. She asked me to reveal to Student Yumir that I’m a married man. Even after revealing it, she asked me to act the same.”

[Isn’t that like setting the stage for a divorce? It seems like she would get angry if you were unfaithful?]

“She even said if we ended up dating, she’d like me to send her the photos we took together.”

[…I feel like all the common sense I’ve built up over my life is collapsing.]

Yes.

That was it, Yumir.

The beginning of the process of becoming a villain was the collapse of common sense.

[Sigh. Fine. Okay. I got it. Hmm, it’s difficult to understand, but let’s assume it’s true. So, why did you choose me? Did your wife ask you to seduce me?]

“No.”

That was not it.

“I approached you because you’re Yumir. Because you’re Yumir.”

[Why?]

“If a pretty college girl with a good body throws herself at me, it’s not human not to fall for her.”

[… You’re crazy.]

She spat out an insult, but there was a hint of laughter mixed in.

[Okay, I get that. I understand up to that point. So… professor.]

Yumir’s voice fell again.

[You approached me because you wanted me, and you still want me now, right?]

“Yes.”

[What do you mean by that?]

“That’s for Student Yumir to decide.”

Whether she wanted to join as a newcomer at Gyeolsa to meet me as the Goblin.

Or whether she wanted to meet Do Ji-Hwan as a woman.

“What does Student Yumir think is the answer?”

[Why do I have to be the one to answer in this situation?]

“Because depending on Student Yumir’s answer, the way I treat you in the future will also change.”

[……]

Yumir didn’t answer.

She seemed to need some time, and I began to get impatient.

I shouldn’t give her time.

If I gave her time, Yumir was the type to turn into a villain and shoot a meteor.

Rather than the whole earth, it would be aimed at my head.

[Alright. Ha, hahaha. I feel like I’m going crazy listening to all this nonsense. But… do you know?]

“What?”

[I don’t know how well you know NTR, but most NTR works…]

Yumir, with a hint of growling anger, let out a laugh and continued.

[Most of them, after coming to the Golden Sun, become bodies that can’t live without the Golden Sun.]

“…Oh?”

Ah.

[Let’s continue flirting. Let’s see. Let’s see how far we can go. Let’s see who wins. I’m excited. I’m not an ordinary woman, either. And…]

Was this really happening?

[I am, after all, good at taking things away.]